How I Reclaimed My Style Postpartum: Tips for New Moms

There are many warnings you get from other moms when you’re pregnant about postpartum challenges. The biggest thing people told me was that, for one reason or another, they didn’t feel like themselves. For me, this manifested in three ways: emotionally, physically, and in my style.

In a way, all of these aspects were connected. When Billie was first born—and I was on maternity leave—my social outings were few and far between. When something social did come up, I relied on a formulaic style (usually a blazer and jeans). It helped hide the areas I felt uncomfortable displaying.

My body had just done something amazing—a miraculous feat that pushed it to its limits. It’s only fair that I give it some time to recover. I did that. I sized up and wore things that helped me feel confident. I constantly reminded myself that this feeling was temporary—or at least could be.

Most days, this strategy worked. My looks might have been occasionally redundant, but I always looked nice. Still, that nagging feeling of not feeling like myself lingered in the back of my mind.

Fashion is a core part of my identity, so not feeling inspired to go all out with every look was tough for me. Everyone, even the most stylish among us, has those moments of not knowing what to wear. But I’ve always prided myself on finding inspiration effortlessly. Recently, though, I was drawing blanks every time I had to get dressed. It felt like inspiration had abandoned me altogether.

Then I started seeing progress in my weight loss journey that had previously plateaued. It wasn’t the number on the scale that made a difference, but the physical changes I was seeing. Digging deeper, I realized it was about showing up for myself and holding myself accountable. I began to feel confident again.

That confidence came from accepting that I’ll never be the Alexa I was pre-pregnancy. My belly may always be a bit soft, and my stretch marks may never fade. That’s not entirely within my control. What is within my control is striving to be the best version of myself. That’s what I did and continue to do.

With that renewed confidence, my style block slowly but surely lifted. I didn’t just have one idea for outfits or events; I had several. Ten months postpartum, I feel like I’m firing on all cylinders. I’m pulling together looks that I dare say are aspirational. And it’s only up from here!

While fashion isn’t everything I am, it continues to be a significant part of my life. I’m so happy that we were able to reconnect. It’s a relationship I wasn’t ready to end.

If you’re struggling with reclaiming your style postpartum, here are a few things that worked for me:

1. Never stop looking for inspiration: One day, which may not be too far off, you’ll look at inspiration and truly feel inspired. From there, the sky’s the limit. Your style will soar.
2. Size up: Those jeans you loved before your baby may not fit for a while. To be honest, they might never fit the way they did before. So, go up a size or two (or three). Don’t limit yourself to stretchy pants and loose clothes until your old clothes fit.
3. Find a combo that works for you: For me, it was a blazer and jeans. For you, it might be something different. Wear what makes you feel the most comfortable. It doesn’t have to be groundbreaking.
4. Don’t try to be your old self: Your old self was gone the minute your baby entered the world. This will change you in many ways, including your style. Just aim to be the best version of yourself for both you and your little one. Your style will reflect that.
5. Give yourself time: Your body has just done something wonderful—something that changes you inside and out. It needs time to adjust. Don’t rush the process; enjoy the journey.

Hang in there, Mama! There’s light at the end of the tunnel.